At the beginning of November 2015 we began our IUI process. We knew people who had many failed IUIs and we were trying to stay positive but realistic. It was scary to get too excited after all of the months of failed attempts with medicines and tests and hopes of a baby. This process of trying to start a family had changed us. We were no longer focused on what the perfect due date would be, having a beautiful way of revealing the pregnancy, or trying to put on the front of life being perfect. We were broken hearted, beat up emotionally, and needed saving from this painful experience of infertility.
Each week in November we were going to the doctor. We had an ultrasound to check my ovaries for eggs. We started medicine to cause my ovulation. Had another ultrasound to look for egg development and blood work to check for ovulation. We were doing at home ovulation checks for the exact day of ovulation. We had the IUI on November 13th and more bloodwork a week later to check my progesterone levels. We started progesterone suppositories since my level was slightly low (which called for an emergency run to a pharmacy in Atlanta since not everywhere has this) and more bloodwork.
All of this effort and we weren’t even sure if we were pregnant. We didn’t know if it was going to work. We were so hopeful, so ready to be parents.
We had been heartbroken many times before. We were timid and reserved with what we would share and who we would share with. We wanted our little bundle of joy, but didn’t want to have the world watching us if this didn’t work.
I can remember praying for many things during this month. Health, happiness, a baby, God’s timing…but what I remember most about this time was praying that God use this time to pull me towards Him and not allow me to push Him away.
Will this work? God it is all in your hands. If this gives us a baby it is only because You allowed it to work. Send us your child. Bless us with a little one to raise up in Your way.